WTH? How can it be Wednesday already? It takes until Wednesday to become tired of my own bullshit* and have the energy to take action to get some stuff done? WTH!
Really, the best I can do sometimes is just laugh at myself, and start over again, for the umpteenth time.
The ideas started with much enthusiasm—this one for sure will be the one to hold my interest—only to turn to the next big idea within a week. The thing is: now I have at least a half a dozen ideas I am working on, and slowly-but-surely I am making progress on all of them.
But the one unfinished project that was weighing on me was my tiny trailer conversion to my clothes closet (among other uses).
Since I could not hire myself as the organizer to help me with Marie Kondo’s “the life-changing magic of tidying up//the Japanese art of decluttering and organizing.” The project had lingered a bit too long—I had completed the first stage of sorting two weeks ago.
The shame of being a disorganized organizer starting to creep in and had to be stopped.
I was tired of my own bullshit AND I want to make room in my tiny trailer for a tiny Christmas tree AND I want to take “after” photos of the project.
Finished. Almost. Photos tomorrow.
In my search through past stamped works I put together, the most appropriate quote to help make sense of my love of order & chaos, I came upon M.C. Escher’s,
We adore chaos because we love to produce order.
There is a weird sense of control I must feel, that at any moment I so chose, I could make complete sense of it all by straightening it all up. But I fight against that action of tidying, that if I do tidy my life becomes a bit unknown, that I must admit I do feel comfort, still, with an amount of chaos.
To be continued.
*The word bullshit makes me chuckle (so does jackass). When I think of my own bullshit, I think of the James Altucher quote, to paraphrase “I am in a war against bullshit, my own bullshit.” and it made me laugh all day and I get off my a**.